Draw Me close - apparently by a group called Kutless. I think my Uncle Ken tried to introduce me to them, but I’ve not really given their CD any play time yet. I like this song a lot, and tonight for the first time it kind of hit me.
First, the acknowledgment that I lay it all down again. Which for me is a continual process. I have a nasty habit of laying it all down, only to pick it up a few hours later. I’m also moved by the acknowledgement of what should be the case…”You’re all I want” and what *IS* the case “You’re all I’ve ever needed”.
It is far too infrequently that I truly accept that Christ should be all I want, and far too infrequently that I acknowledge He’s all I ever need. I’m still hit by the acknowledgement though that we fail. “Help me find a way, bring me back to you” and “I lay it all down *again*” both give me pause…they give me hope.
When the tank is on empty…so often we don’t lay it all down. We wallow in the futility of the emptiness. We become consumed by the emptiness (to steal a line from Nickel Creek) “there’s a kind of emptiness that can fill you” but you become a shell. Almost a shade. But what do you do when you know that you haven’t reached the point where “You’re all I want”?
I get conflicted, confused and confounded by things like knowing that Christ is all I need, and should be all I want, yet there are desires of my heart that I’m also supposed to be able to ask for. He knows what I need, and what I want, and what is good for me. So do I even bother? Do I “go for the gold” or do I have to give it all up, to gain even more back.
So many questions, so many choices, I just hope that I can lay it all down again. Help me find a way, bring me (back?) to you…
But even that seems flawed. Help *ME* find a way…isn’t that the problem? He IS the WAY. Help me find YOU? I’m so confused…I think I need some sleep…
Draw me close to you…never let me go…help me know you are near…
